It has been a while since I have blogged. Partly because I have been so busy at work, but mainly I have not been as inspired to write as I normally am. Yesterday, I was working with a young man and he and i had a two hour long conversation about purpose. I realized this question probably lingers in so many peoples minds. What is our purpose....?????
Why live a purpose driven life, with absolutely no purpose?
I have never understood lazy people. When people tell me that can't do something, I always say actually you don't want to. Because anytime someone really wants something, they get it. They say a mother can rip a child from the grips of death because her desire to protect her offspring is so vital, that nothing can keep her from doing so. That determination and WANT is what drives her to protect. I imagine if we all had that determination to protect the life that was given us each day we might have a different motive for each day.
I recently had a very long conversation with a young man. He actually inspired my thoughts around this whole word, purpose.
This young man reminds me of so many people I know. Often these young adults, walk through the twenties completely lost. They have no idea what they want, but they feel entitled and they think the whole world is at their fingertips. They also feel like hard work, is just not necessary. You don't have to work you way up, or rather be told what to do. They feel they should just be given the opportunities. Now this may sound like assumptions but I have worked with these young adults for a very long time now. Its always the same. They seem so lost, feel like they need to find a hobby to fill their time. They just cannot figure out what they should be doing with their lives. But alot of the time the answer is right there in front of them. They often will tell me that they just want the answer to unfold and not have to work so hard to find it.
He and I were talking about the fact that he graduated in July and still has not found a job. He asked me, "Andrea, is this your dream job?" And I asked, " Is that what you are looking for right now? Your dream job?" And he said, "well yes, of course! I just got a degree, shouldn't I be doing something that I always thought I should be doing right now?' I then told him my story about how I started off in school wanting something and ended up doing something completely different. But then I started to think about that question alot. He is like so many of the kids that work for me. NO real concept of the world or what to expect. No real intentions, and no real ambitions. They just are not realistic. I believe in working hard, working your way up and earning the position but I grew up with two parents who did that. I asked him, "what is the purpose of your life right now?" He looked stunned. "Purpose?" he asked. "Yeah, what is your purpose? What do you plan on leaving behind? What do you aspire to do with yourself? Because when you can answer that question, then Ill answer the question about my dream job." He got really quiet. Which is not normal for him. He said, "That is pretty deep isn't it?" I said, "Is it? Because this is your life we are talking about and I believe we are all placed here to make choices that lead to the path that was given to us, it is our purpose. Like right now, right here, this is my purpose. I work with so many of you young adults, I can relate to the questions you might ask yourself everyday. What am I doing?" He chuckled. "Yeah, I just asked myself that question this morning." I told him, " I think you need to start thinking about that question a little more right now, and a little less about the end result all the time. " He got very quiet and said, "WOW!"
I know so many people that drown out the noise, so they don't have to think about the fact that they get up every morning, go to work, go home, go out, or just go to bed. They do this each and every day to drown out the noises in their heads telling them to step up to the plate and take a swing for the fences. Why do you get up every morning? But more importantly what I was trying to help him see, is that the work he wants to do is NOT his purpose, its just a result. I wanted him to understand that unfortunately so many people think that your job is your purpose. And your job could be feeding the hungry, helping the sick, and teaching others but once again, that is your job. So ask yourself, "What is your purpose?"
I remember having a conversation with a friend. I had just turned 25 and was having a bit of a breakdown. I felt so lost, felt like I kept doing and repeating each day. I have no idea why I got up every morning, if all I was gonna do is work in a retail store. I was making no significant impact on anyone, this world or my life. I was about to get married and I think I just could not wrap my mind on what I was doing with my life. My friend suggested some things at the time, like volunteering and getting more involved with the church. I thought about all of those things but still was at a loss. But then I had something interesting happen at work that night. I had a kid who was extremely depressed ask me for help. He was not taking his antidepressants and was really not well. He said he needed to talk so we did. I listened and realized how ill he really was. Several of friends over the course of the next few days told me what he was doing and that they felt he could commit suicide if we didn't get him help. He trusted me, all my kids did, so i did something, I called his mother. I went into his file, and found his emergency contact. I arranged an intervention. His parents met me and we were able to get him into treatment that night. That week was a crazy week for me, but then I realized that whatever I do each day can have a purpose, if I choose to be AWARE of them.
People always say there are certain things in life that change you. Your wedding day, the birth of a child and the day you lose someone you love. I can tell you that the day I gave birth to my very first son, I realized right then and there what my purpose was. I realized I had taken life for granted, lived it selfishly and hadn't stopped to take in the moments that count as often as I should. I realized my purpose right then and there.
My purpose is him.
