Chance.

I always tell people the story of how I broke out of being afraid of rejection and started facing it head on.

I had just graduated high school and was getting ready to gear up to go to college.  I had realized that the whole year of my senior year I had sat in front of a boy that I probably had loved since middle school but just didn't know it.  Not many people know this story, so here goes.

I was given many rules as a girl.  My mom was scared to death I would run off and make poor choices.  But I was  good kid.  I was very active in school and kept myself busy.  My best friend's family had asked me to go on a vacation with them for the summer and when I did I met Trey.  That boy and I stayed together for four years.  But before I had met him I actually had another boyfriend.  My mom had found out and the rule was no boys until I was 15.  He and I broke up, but he said he would wait for me over the summer.

But that summer I met the other.  Of course, I wasn't allowed to have a boyfriend, this guy was my friend until it was "allowed."  But my first day of school, James came up to me and asked me how my summer was.  I told him it was great.  And he said he had heard just how great it was.  We kind of left it at that.  But he always kept an eye on me.  Always sat by me, always looked at me. But I was in another world.  I didn't even notice him until my senior year when he sat right behind me.  He had a girlfriend and I saw him as just a really funny guy.  But as the year started to draw to an end, I realized I might not ever see this guy again.   My dad had always been gone working, so I had had a boyfriend really, I think now, to fill that void.  So my senior year, I broke up with the Trey after four years together.  I knew he wasn't gonna be the person I would end up with.  But, until my senior year, I just hadn't realized how different him and I actually were.  He took it really hard, but it really had nothing to do with him or James. It had to do with me.  I knew I had to leave that town, and he just wasn't gonna be able to keep up with what I had planned for myself.

So that day I got the phone book, looked up the phone number and called James.  His mother answered and I could hear her yelling for him.  He asked who it was and she told him, I don't know, some girl.  I giggled.  And then he picked up and said, "Hello."  My heart dropped, but I was determined to tell him.  So I said," Hi James, its Andrea." He sounded stunned and before he could get a word out I let it all out.  "Listen, I know you have a girlfriend and I totally respect that.  But I wanted to call you today to tell you that if that ever changes, to please give me a call.  I like you and before I go off to college, I Just don't want you to forget about me."  There was silence.  I kept thinking, "oh crap did he hang up?"
Then he said, "hey can I call you back in a couple of minutes?" And of course i said sure as the defeat went thru my body.  I was like what the heck did I just do.

Now the reason why I am telling you this story isn't because I want you to think about the love story.  But the feeling you get that holds you back from taking a chance.  That day I woke up and told myself I would take that chance.  What did I have to lose?  I mean we all are afraid of rejection, it whats keep us at bay and never allows us to reach our potential.  In everything we do, that one thing hinders us.  I had spent at that time, my whole life letting that prevent me from enjoying life.  I just refused to do it anymore.  What really did I have to lose?

Ten minutes later I got a phone call. It was James. He said, " want to go out on Friday night?" and I said, "Umm, NO! Im sorry I don't do that.  I am no boyfriend stealer."  and he said laughing, "that's alright because I don't have one anymore." 

For the next year he and I had the best time together.  I learned so much from my relationship from him.  He set the standard really high for me and when it came time to remember what I deserved I always remember how he treated me.  Now I didn't end up with him, but that's the way my story is suppose to go.  But if I had not done that one thing, how good would this story actually be?  But more importantly, from that moment on, I was no longer afraid of rejection.  I could be afraid of failure, disappointment, etc.  but I knew right then, the world was at my fingertips.  I just had to keep reaching.

The next time it was time to take a chance, is when I met my husband.  That's what you have to do sometimes to get what you want.  Take a chance.  Luckily, my husband took a chance on me. And our story continues because of it.